I have relationships with many corporations of all shapes and sizes. I practice “brand promiscuity” and mostly do what’s convenient. I have no dog in the hunt of the cola wars (well me and Coke Zero kind of have a thing but it isn’t exclusive), I tolerate my cell phone provider and I don’t have “my brand” of jeans. I do tend to embrace the product of whatever company I consult for. Well, right now I am consulting for an engineering company and I don’t really need any construction drawings of an oil rig so our embrace is a bit lighter than my previous client where I literally filled my closets with every possible permutation of athleisure.

OK. <Deep Breath>. I am in an abusive relationship with United Airlines for over 2.3 million miles. And. I. Keep. Coming. Back. For. More.  Why?  I mean I viscerally hate United Airlines, I don’t even have brands I dislike mildly, but a run-in with United can leave me trembling with anxiety. I pity the employees there who care about the customers because it is clear their bosses don’t. The quality and consistency of their service is atrocious. Three times in one year I had a United close a door on me on a connecting flight when they knew I was on the flight — I was then a “Global Services” member, their highest teir of loyalty. In each case when I became pissed off the rep tried to blame it on me for some reason. Never a single follow-up from United, though I am not sure they would realize if one of their planes vanished completely.

So here is my latest: I have been flying back and forth to Australia in business class on United. It’s cool, you get a ton of miles almost 70K each way, and UA flies 787s on the route which makes long distance flying way more tolerable. So I look at my statement today and I got my 67K miles SF->Sydney last trip. But next to the return there is an asterisk that says: “75K limit on award miles for one trip”. WTF? Now previously I had flown the route but it was split in two tickets and I got full credit both ways, now I lost 60K miles.

So I think, well even United couldn’t be that stupid. I’ll just write and they will fix it.

Message: Why would you penalize your most frequent travelers on your most expensive flights? What is the intention of your policy limiting award miles to 75K on a single ticket ?

Yes, I am smart enough to have my travel book two separate tickets from now on, but I should never have to do this. I would have been better off on miles taking Qantas on the return.

I would appreciate you crediting my account with the missing miles that I lost due to this ridiculous policy.

Thank You.

The response came in 30 minutes.

Hello Mr. Stern,

Thank you for your email.

We are very sorry to hear of your disappointment the 75,000 mile earning limit. Unfortunately, we cannot credit your account with any miles earned over the 75,000 limitation.

Whenever possible, we try to accommodate our customers’ requests and are sorry that we cannot do so in this instance.  We value your business and look forward to serving you in the future. 

Regards,

Melodie MileagePlus® Service Center

To which I wanted to responded:

Fair enough, I will publish your response on my blog and make sure that one of my $15,000 Australia round trips in business class I will take one way in Qantas.

At some point perhaps you can become a airline that listens to its customers. I celebrated the day I lost my Global Services status because it meant i had a choice on who to fly.
To which I really wanted to add. And by the way, you weren’t fucking sorry, I saw right through that. And you work for THE WORST FUCKING AIRLINE IN THE HISTORY OF MANKIND, I’LL NEVER FLY YOU AGAIN!!!!!
My next flight with United is on Saturday.

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